she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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