Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
