omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm bleeding and have questions
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
