ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Randomize
