she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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