I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
