2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Randomize
