White coat. Heels.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Randomize
