im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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