Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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