I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Randomize
