i don't plan on having that self control this summer
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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