I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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