I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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