please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
