Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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