we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
How does one acquire holy water?
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
