have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
