don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
