How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize