I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
