i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
