dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
