did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
