I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
