I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize