I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
