never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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