Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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