she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
