Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
