Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
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