i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
