I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
