i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
