when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Randomize
