okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
