before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
