You really coming over, don't trick.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
you traded sex for a burrito?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
