8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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