I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
