If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Randomize
