You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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