I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
