how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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