Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
We got so high we made milksteak
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
