gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
