My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
