You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
His nipple licking is glorious
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