You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
