that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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