you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
